Category: Blogs

When chaos strikes, the brain’s instinct is to protect, not to reflect. Stress hormones surge, the amygdala fires, and logic shuts down. But what if, instead of reacting from fear, you could respond from awareness? That shift—simple but powerful—is what separates survival from self-leadership.

Below are two proven practices to help you regain control over your energy, mind, and choices.

1. Create Inner Safety: Pause and Ground Yourself: When everything outside feels unstable, your nervous system is begging for a signal of safety. Inner safety doesn’t come from circumstances—it comes from connection with yourself. Try this practice:

• Place one hand over your heart and the other on your belly.

• Inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4, and exhale slowly for 6.

• Say quietly: “I am safe in this breath.”

This 30-second ritual activates your vagus nerve, calming your stress response and re-engaging your prefrontal cortex, the part of your brain responsible for decision-making and empathy (Porges, Polyvagal Theory, 2011).

Every time you do this—before a meeting, an email, or a difficult conversation—you’re teaching your body: I can meet life from presence, not panic.

Benefit: More clarity, less reactivity, better regulation.
Result: You stop leaking energy into worry and start leading from calm authority.

2. Reclaim Your Power: Replace “Why Me?” with “What Now?”

Victimhood says, “Life is happening to me.”
Agency says, “Life is happening through me.”

The first keeps you trapped in reaction; the second invites you back to creation.
Ask yourself:

“What part of this moment is mine to manage?”

Even if the only answer is your breath, your tone, or your next choice—that’s enough.
According to research on learned helplessness (Seligman, 1975), small, intentional actions reverse the mental state of powerlessness and rebuild self-efficacy.

Start with one micro-choice at a time:

• Take a walk before replying to that stressful message.

• Speak truth instead of staying silent.

• Choose compassion over control.

Benefit: Each act of responsibility strengthens neural pathways for confidence and hope.
Result: You stop being carried by life’s storms and start steering through them with purpose.

Responsibility is not a burden—it’s a return to freedom.
Every time you pause, breathe, and act with intention, you reclaim your place as the author of your own story.

Burnout isn’t laziness—it’s grief for a life out of alignment.

David, an executive client, shared:

“I’ve built a career around achievement, but inside I feel like a zombie in a suit.”

That’s not drama—it’s data.

• 62 % of professionals report feeling emotionally exhausted (Deloitte Human Capital Trends 2025).
• Chronic overwork reduces the brain’s dopamine sensitivity, numbing joy and motivation (Nature Neuroscience).

The truth: We can’t think our way out of burnout. We must feel our way back to purpose.

Why We Experience Burnout

Burnout is our body and soul’s alarm system saying, “I can’t keep living like this.”

Here’s what’s really happening beneath the surface:

1. Psychologically — When meaning collapses, motivation follows.
   Burnout occurs when sustained effort no longer connects to intrinsic meaning. Dr. Christina Maslach, creator of the Maslach Burnout Inventory, defines it as “a prolonged response to chronic emotional and interpersonal stressors on the job.” When work loses purpose, even high performers begin to feel detached and cynical (Maslach & Leiter, Annual Review of Psychology, 2016).
2. Neurologically — Your brain shifts from purpose to protection.
   Chronic stress traps the brain in a state of survival mode. The amygdala (fear center) overactivates, flooding the body with cortisol, while the prefrontal cortex—the region responsible for clarity, planning, and empathy—goes offline (McEwen, Nature Neuroscience, 2007).
   This explains why burned-out professionals describe feeling foggy, irritable, and emotionally numb: the brain is literally conserving energy for survival, rather than for creativity.
3. Emotionally — We disconnect from joy and belonging.
   According to Dr. Brené Brown’s research on exhaustion and shame, burnout thrives when we tie our worth to productivity. We lose touch with our emotional needs and begin performing instead of feeling. Over time, that self-abandonment erodes vitality and authenticity (Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection, 2010).
4. Culturally — We’ve normalized overdoing.
   In many organizations, overwork is mistaken for commitment. Yet research from Deloitte (2025) found that 62% of professionals feel emotionally exhausted, and one in three are considering career changes due to misalignment with their values.
   Burnout isn’t just a personal problem—it’s a cultural condition born from systems that reward performance over presence.
5. Existentially — We forget why we started.
   As Viktor Frankl wrote in Man’s Search for Meaning (1946), “When a person can’t find a deep sense of meaning, they distract themselves with pleasure.”
   Burnout often signals a spiritual crisis of purpose. We’ve achieved what we thought we wanted, but lost the “why” that gives life texture and direction.

Mini Self-Assessment — Where Are You in the Burnout Cycle?

Rate each from 1 (never) to 5 (always):

1. I wake up already tired.
2. I feel numb or resentful at work.
3. I say yes to things that drain me.
4. I can’t remember what inspired me to begin.
5. I feel guilty resting.

Scoring

• 5–10 = Stable but stretched. Protect your energy.
• 11–18 = Warning zone—realign now.
• 19–25 = Full burnout—pause and seek support.

For a more detailed assessment, click here.

Purpose Mapping Reboot
Choose one goal you’ve been chasing and ask “Why?” five times.
By the fifth why, you’ll find the emotion you’re really after—peace, freedom, belonging.
That’s your true North.

Reflection Prompt: Which part of you is still begging to breathe?

Reignite Your Purpose — Take the quiz here.

The Breaking Through Coaching Perspective
In Breaking Through Coaching, we view burnout not as failure, but as a threshold moment.
Through guided reflection, behavioral tools, and mindset reprogramming, coaching helps you reconnect with your core values, reset your nervous system, and design a life aligned with purpose and peace.

When professionals shift from proving to being, their energy, relationships, and leadership naturally realign. Let’s talk.

Rediscover the Meaning Behind What You Do—and Why You Do It

In today’s world, achievement is everywhere—but alignment is rare.
We climb ladders, chase goals, and fill our calendars, yet still wonder: Is this it? Is this what I was made for?

That quiet ache inside you isn’t restlessness—it’s your purpose calling.

According to a Harvard School of Public Health study, people who live with a clear sense of purpose are not only more fulfilled but also experience better health, lower stress, and greater resilience. Another landmark study by Stanford University’s Center for Meaning and Purpose found that people who align their work and relationships with their sense of meaning experience higher motivation, stronger relationships, and longer-lasting happiness.

Your purpose is more than a passion—it’s your compass. It guides how you show up, lead, love, and live.

The Got Purpose? Assessment

A 5-minute self-reflection that can transform how you see yourself—and your path ahead.

This simple yet powerful tool helps you:

• Identify where you are in your purpose journey—Discover, Align, or Activate.

• Reveal what may be missing between your inner compass and your outer direction.

• Reignite clarity, confidence, and meaning in your work, relationships, and leadership.

Every question is grounded in positive psychology, existential meaning research, and decades of purpose-centered coaching experience. It’s not a personality test—it’s a mirror. A gentle invitation to pause and listen to your life.

Why Purpose Matters (and Why It’s Easy to Lose It)

Research by the Journal of Positive Psychology shows that people with a strong sense of purpose:

• Are 64% more satisfied with their jobs

• Are 2.5 times more likely to feel engaged and fulfilled

• Experience greater emotional well-being and longevity

Yet many high-achieving professionals—especially women—lose touch with their “why” amid pressure, perfectionism, and constant doing.

That’s where this assessment becomes more than a quiz.
It’s a Power Pause—a guided moment to reconnect with the truth of who you are, what you value, and the impact you’re meant to make.

What You’ll Discover

When you complete the Got Purpose? Assessment, you’ll receive your personalized results—and learn which of the three purpose stages you’re in:

1. The Seeker

You’re exploring, asking big questions, and ready to define what truly fulfills you.
➡️ It’s time to discover your deeper “why.”

2. The Aligner

You know what matters—now you’re learning to bring it into every area of your life.
➡️ It’s time to create harmony between what you do and who you are.

3. The Activator

You’re ready to lead and live your purpose out loud—with courage, clarity, and confidence.
➡️ It’s time to elevate your impact and influence.

Practical Wisdom: How to Apply Your Results

No matter your stage, purpose grows through daily alignment:

• Pause daily: Begin each morning by asking, “What would purpose look like in my next conversation, decision, or task?”

• Reflect weekly: Notice where you felt most alive and where you felt drained—your energy always tells the truth.

• Lead consciously: Bring your values into your leadership. Purpose-led leaders inspire trust, clarity, and collaboration.

• Connect intentionally: Surround yourself with people who fuel your purpose—not your pressure.

Purpose isn’t a destination—it’s a practice. Every day is a new invitation to come home to yourself.

Ready to Explore Yours?

Take five minutes for yourself today.
Pause the noise. Reconnect with your compass. Reclaim your clarity.

Take the Got Purpose? Quiz Now → Click HERE.

Once you complete the assessment, you’ll receive your personalized results and a free guide with simple, evidence-based practices to deepen your sense of purpose and fulfillment.

And if you’re ready to go further— schedule a Purpose Discovery Call with me, where we’ll unpack your results and map your next steps to align your life, career, and leadership with your true purpose.

📅 [Book Your Discovery Call HERE.

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Because When You Live on Purpose, You Lead with Power.

Your purpose is your light.
And when you lead from that light, you don’t just change your life.
You change the world around you.

Awareness is the spark, but change happens in practice. Breaking out of the Drama Triangle requires conscious, repeated choices that rewire our habits—a process Dr. Judith Wright calls rematrixing. Every time you choose differently, you strengthen new neural pathways and make delight your default, rather than drama.

Here’s the framework I teach my clients:

Step 1 – Notice the Role.
When you feel drained, defensive, or resentful, pause and ask:

• Am I acting like a Victim (powerless)?
• A Rescuer (fixing)?
• A Persecutor (controlling)?

Even naming it is progress—it moves the behavior from unconscious to conscious.

Step 2 – Name the Need.
Underneath each role is a legitimate, unmet need:

• Victim → needs hope, clarity, or empowerment.
• Rescuer → needs rest, boundaries, or trust in others.
• Persecutor → needs respect, clarity, or a sense of safety.

Step 3 – Choose a New Role.
Shift to the healthier alternatives from David Emerald’s Empowerment Triangle:

• Victim → Creator (I do have choices. I can take one small step.)
• Rescuer → Coach (I can ask questions that empower instead of rescuing.)
• Persecutor → Challenger (I can set clear expectations without blame.)

Step 4 – Use the Power Pause.
Take one deep breath before reacting. Ask yourself: Which role am I in? Which empowered role do I want to choose instead?

Client Examples in Action:

• Rescuer → Coach: My executive client stopped solving her team’s problems and started asking, “What support do you need to move forward?” Her team became more accountable, and she felt less drained.
• Victim → Creator: A nonprofit director overwhelmed by donor demands shifted from saying “I can’t” to “Here are my choices.” By delegating and setting clearer boundaries, she found energy and agency.
• Persecutor → Challenger: A manager who often micromanaged reframed her directness into clarity: “Here are the expectations, and here’s why they matter.” Her team respected her more, and she felt less guilty.

The Neuroscience of Practice:
Every time you pause, name the role, and choose differently, you strengthen the prefrontal cortex—the part of your brain responsible for decision-making, emotional regulation, and intentional behavior (Siegel, 2012). Over time, this rewiring reduces stress responses and creates a new default: empowerment instead of drama.

Reflection Prompt: This week, choose one relationship where you’ll practice this shift. Which role will you step out of, and which empowered role will you step into?

Stuck in the Drama Triangle? Let’s explore what is possible for you to break free. Take a Power Pause and bring your concrete example to Clara Lucia and experience a breakthrough in that relationship. Book your call now.

The good news is that the Drama Triangle isn’t permanent—it’s a pattern, not a personality. And patterns can be changed. The bridge from drama to delight is emotional intelligence (EQ).

What is EQ?
EQ is the ability to recognize, understand, and manage emotions—our own and others’. It’s what allows us to pause instead of lash out, to set boundaries instead of over-functioning, and to lead with curiosity instead of judgment.

Daniel Goleman, a leading researcher on emotional intelligence, found that EQ is twice as important as IQ and technical skills combined in determining outstanding leadership performance (Goleman, 1998). Harvard Business Review echoes this: 90% of top-performing leaders score high in EQ, and teams led by emotionally intelligent leaders are more engaged, collaborative, and resilient (HBR, 2017).

How EQ disrupts the Drama Triangle:

• Self-awareness helps us recognize when we’re slipping into the Rescuer (“I’m fixing too much”), Victim (“I feel trapped”), or Persecutor (“I’m being harsh”) roles.

• Self-regulation gives us the pause to choose differently, rather than reacting out of habit.

• Empathy helps us see that others are not obstacles, but humans with their own needs and fears.

• Social skills enable us to communicate clearly, set boundaries, and hold accountability without drama.

Client Story: One of my clients, a COO, realized she was constantly rescuing her team—answering emails late at night, jumping into everyone’s projects, and leaving no space for her own strategy work. Once she built self-awareness, she could name the pattern: “I’m rescuing again.” With coaching, she shifted into empathy and coaching questions like, “What’s your next step?” Instead of rescuing, she empowered. Her team grew more accountable, and she reclaimed her evenings.

The science is precise: when leaders step out of drama and into emotional intelligence, they not only protect their own well-being—they transform culture.

Reflection Prompt: What relationship at work or home would feel lighter if you brought more curiosity and less control, more boundaries and less rescuing?

If this resonates with you, please take a Power Pause and book your free call with Coach Clara Lucia TODAY.

No matter how successful or self-aware we are, most of us get caught in hidden relationship patterns that quietly drain our energy. They show up in boardrooms, family dinners, and even in the conversations we replay in our heads at night.

These patterns are subtle. They don’t announce themselves. Instead, they disguise themselves as “helping,” “defending,” or “keeping the peace.” But underneath, they leave us feeling resentful, exhausted, or misunderstood.

Psychologist Stephen Karpman called this dynamic the Drama Triangle, with three roles we unconsciously play:

• Victim – feeling powerless, stuck, or helpless.
• Rescuer – over-functioning, fixing, or saving others at the expense of ourselves.
• Persecutor – blaming, micromanaging, or reacting harshly.

I’ve seen this pattern in many of my clients:

• A senior executive who was constantly in Rescuer mode—taking on her team’s work, fixing problems herself, and burning out because she equated leadership with doing it all.
• A nonprofit leader who slipped into the Victim role, overwhelmed by donor demands and limited resources, convinced she had “no choice” but to sacrifice her health.
• A high-level manager who unintentionally fell into Persecutor mode, micromanaging under pressure, and later feeling guilty for her tone.

And yes—I’ve been there, too. Early in my corporate career, I slipped easily into the Rescuer role, trying to prove my worth by fixing everything. It seemed like a commitment, but inside, it was disconnection—from myself and from others.

Practical Ways to Step Out of Drama in the Moment

Here are small but powerful steps you can take when you notice you’re caught in the triangle:

1. Pause & Breathe: Before reacting, take one deep breath. Slowing your nervous system is the first step to breaking the pattern.
2. Name the Role: Say to yourself, “I’m in Rescuer right now,” or “I feel like a Victim in this moment.” Naming reduces shame and brings clarity.
3. Ask a Power Question: Instead of acting automatically, ask:
   • If you feel like a Victim: “What choices do I have right now?”
   • If you feel like a Rescuer: “Am I helping, or am I over-functioning?”
   • If you feel like a Persecutor: “What need of mine isn’t being met, and how can I ask for it clearly instead of lashing out?”
4. Own Your Breakthrough: Say aloud (or journal): “I choose to break free. I can lead with clarity, not pressure. I can show up with love, not fear.”

Even these micro-shifts build awareness. And awareness is the first step toward transformation.

Reflection Prompt: When was the last time you noticed yourself rescuing, blaming, or feeling powerless? What’s one small step you can take to break free next time?

Tired of trying to figure out how to break free from The Drama Triangle? Reach out, take a Poer Pause, and explore your options. Book your time with Coach Clara Lucia HERE.

Reflection alone is powerful—but real transformation comes when we practice. Purpose isn’t meant to be a lofty idea tucked away in a journal. It’s a daily compass, a practical guide that helps us navigate the moments when cultural bias, workplace pressure, or self-doubt threaten to pull us off course.

The truth is: we can’t always control how others perceive us, but we can control how we show up. When we align our behaviors with purpose, we reclaim agency. We turn what’s been labeled as “too much” into exactly what’s needed.

Here’s how you can begin putting this into practice:

Step 1: Identify the Misread Strength
Write down one cultural trait or leadership behavior you’ve been told is “too much.”

Examples:

• Directness

• Emotional expressiveness

• Prioritizing family/community

• Passionate communication

Step 2: Reframe It Through Purpose
Ask: How does this trait connect to my values, and how does it serve others when expressed intentionally?

• Outspoken → I bring clarity and courage to tough conversations.

• Warmth → I foster trust and connection that fuel collaboration.

• Expressiveness → I inspire action through authentic energy.

• Collectivism → I model balance and shared responsibility.

Step 3: Lead with Intention
Choose one meeting, conversation, or decision this week to embody that trait unapologetically—anchored in purpose. Notice how it shifts the energy and outcome.

Neuroscience backs this practice. Purpose activates the prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain linked to decision-making and emotional regulation (Wong, 2012). The more you practice aligning behavior to purpose, the stronger those neural pathways become—what Dr. Judith Wright calls rematrixing—rewiring outdated patterns into empowered new ones.

Reflection Prompt: What’s one behavior you’ll rematrix this week so it becomes a tool for service instead of a source of shame? 

How was this article helpful? Let’s connect to discuss. Take a Power Pause and book your free discovery call HERE.

Purpose is more than a motivational buzzword. It is the compass that grounds us when external perceptions or cultural misunderstandings try to throw us off course.

• Health & Longevity: Research shows that adults with a strong sense of purpose have a 15% lower risk of mortality over a decade compared to those who feel aimless (Alimujiang et al., 2019). Purpose is linked to reduced risk of Alzheimer’s disease, stronger immune response, and better recovery from stress (Boyle et al., 2009).

• Workplace Engagement: A McKinsey study found that employees who connect to their purpose at work are five times more engaged, four times more likely to report higher motivation, and three times more likely to stay with their employer in the long term (McKinsey, 2021).

• Leadership Courage: Brené Brown’s research emphasizes that clarity of values (an expression of purpose) enables leaders to step into vulnerability without collapsing under judgment. In her words: “Clear is kind. Unclear is unkind.” Purpose gives us that clarity, and clarity breeds courage.

For leaders of color, purpose also serves as a shield against stereotype threat—the psychological pressure of being judged by cultural bias (Steele, 1997). When we act from fear of being misunderstood, we shrink. But when we act from purpose, we expand into authenticity.

Purpose reframes the story. Outspoken doesn’t mean aggressive; it means I bring clarity to the table. Warmth doesn’t mean unprofessional; it means I create trust. Collectivism doesn’t mean unfocused; it means I value community and long-term sustainability.

Reflection Prompt: If every leadership decision you made this week was guided by purpose—not fear of judgment—what would shift in your life?

Ready to share and explore your leadership ability and connection to purpose? Tape a Power Pause. Click HERE to chat.

As a Latina in leadership, I’ve often felt the tension of cultural translation. In one setting, my behavior is celebrated; in another, it’s criticized.

• Being outspoken: In Latin America, raising your voice with conviction signals passion, courage, and commitment to the collective good. In many North American workplaces, the same behavior can be labeled as “too aggressive” or “disrespectful.”

• Warmth and physical connection: Where I come from, greeting with warmth, sometimes even with a hug, builds trust and signals care. Yet in U.S. corporate culture, this may be considered unprofessional or “too personal.”

• Expressive communication: Our tone, gestures, and storytelling add life and emotion to conversations. But in environments that value stoicism or data-only dialogue, this can be dismissed as “too emotional.”

• Collectivism: In Latin culture, centering family and community is a strength—it fosters loyalty and shared responsibility. In an individualistic culture, however, it can be perceived as a sign of insecurity and a lack of ambition or drive.

What I’ve learned is this: these behaviors are not flaws. They are cultural assets. What may be labeled as “too much” is often what makes us impactful, human-centered leaders.

Research in cross-cultural leadership supports this. GLOBE studies on cultural dimensions highlight how Latin American cultures score higher in collectivism and humane orientation compared to the U.S., which scores higher in individualism (House et al., 2004). These differences influence not just leadership perceptions but how leaders are evaluated and rewarded.

When we abandon these traits to fit in, we lose authenticity. But when we filter them through purpose—our inner compass—we integrate the best of both worlds: passion with presence, individuality with impact.

Reflection Prompt: Which leadership behavior from your heritage have you been told is “too much”? How might that actually be your superpower when rooted in purpose?

Ready to connect and explore your leadership style, barriers, and possibilities? Take a Power Pause. Click HERE to book a time on my calendar.

Belonging is not a luxury. It’s oxygen.
It’s the quiet assurance that I matter here. I’m safe here. I don’t have to hide who I am here.

Yet in today’s workplace, belonging is often the first thing to be jeopardized. Subtle dynamics—often unspoken—can cause even the most talented professionals to retreat, doubt themselves, or overperform in an effort to maintain visibility.

I know this story well. As a Latina immigrant climbing the corporate ladder, I often felt I had to tone down my accent, double-check my ideas, and constantly “earn” my seat. The cost of belonging by assimilation is heavy—it disconnects us from our authenticity.

Inclusion: Belonging in Action

Belonging is a feeling. Inclusion is the practice that makes belonging possible.

True inclusion means creating a workplace where every employee feels heard, valued, and respected for their individuality—not despite their differences, but because of them. It’s not about assimilation or a token celebration of diversity. It’s about honoring the uniqueness each person brings and weaving it into the organization’s culture.

When leaders practice inclusion, they unlock a sense of belonging. And when belonging thrives, so do people and organizations.

What the Research Shows

Brené Brown defines belonging as “being accepted for you—your authentic, imperfect self.” Fitting in, she reminds us, is the opposite of belonging because it demands self-betrayal.

The data confirms how high the stakes are:

• Employees who feel they belong are 56% more likely to perform at a higher level, 50% less likely to leave, and report 75% fewer sick days (BetterUp, 2019).
• Exclusion—even in subtle forms—leads to disengagement, burnout, and increased turnover (Harvard Business Review, 2020).
• Brené Brown’s research shows that psychological safety—the freedom to take risks, speak up, and be vulnerable without fear of shame—is the #1 predictor of high-performing teams.

Belonging is not just a human need—it’s a business imperative.

Where Belonging Gets Jeopardized

Here are tangible ways belonging is quietly undermined in the workplace:

• In Meetings: When a Latina leader’s ideas are overlooked until repeated by someone else, signaling her voice carries less weight.
• In Promotions: When high-achieving women are told they’re “not ready yet,” despite outperforming peers—a reflection of bias, not ability.
• In Team Culture: When employees are celebrated for long hours and “hustle,” but not for boundary-setting, rest, or emotional intelligence.
• In ERGs (Employee Resource Groups): When cultural events are treated as “check-the-box” celebrations rather than opportunities to integrate diverse perspectives into core strategy.

I’ve lived many of these moments. Each time, I felt the tug to perform, to prove, to please—just to stay in the room. But real leadership calls us to something different: to name these dynamics, challenge them, and create workplaces where people don’t just fit in—they belong.

Your Leadership Invitation

Belonging doesn’t happen by accident. It happens when leaders—at every level—exercise their influence to call out what’s undermining humanity in the room.

Here’s how you can start:

1. Name It: If you see someone interrupted, overlooked, or minimized, pause and name it. “I’d like to hear Maria finish her thought.”
2. Challenge It: Examine policies or norms that reward performance over presence. Ask, “Does this system value individuality—or pressure conformity?”
3. Change It: Build inclusive practices into daily culture. Begin meetings with personal check-ins, rotate speaking order, or create rituals that celebrate differences in authentic ways.

Closing Reflection

Inclusion is not a one-time initiative—it’s a daily leadership choice. When we lead inclusively, we cultivate workplaces where every employee feels heard, valued, and respected for who they are. That is how belonging becomes sustainable.

I’ve learned that leadership isn’t about being the loudest in the room—it’s about creating rooms where everyone feels free to bring their whole selves. That is how we reclaim purpose, reignite leadership, and realign culture.

Reflection Prompt: Where in your leadership can you create more inclusion—and, in turn, more belonging—this week? Want to explore options? Book a time to connect HERE.